Recent posts
Katie Redman, 2020. COVID Reformulation Postcards Katie Redman. Reformulation, Summer, p.10.
Dear CoVid-19,
Things happened so fast when you came. A build-up – unclear – late March then we were told: social distance, cancel our active life, schools too. Work from home, stay at home.
Wasn't it going to be just 'a few weeks'? Paperwork done, life on hold, then back to 'normal'? Was I in a strange denial? Protected at home I sensed in dread and tried to detach from your uncertain invading in my role as a clinical psychologist. You carved up our landscape, scattering shock in statistics, rising dead numbers around me and I no longer know what I feel. Yet as I still feel an urgent need to reach out to clients. But how? When I feel lost in my own home, suddenly working from home?
I lost my sense of where ‘me’ ended and work began. There is no switching off. I will switch off! I can't.... I must! It's all the stagnant same. Am I repeating my lines? You're making me do lines! What was my focus again?
I was feeling lost...unsure of what to offer clients. A 16 session CAT or a locked down CAT from remote afar? I miss you my colleagues and clients – face to face.
All too soon, a clean boundary. Out of the house, back to work in a separated work space! The wonder of connecting with colleagues – even at two metres and online supervision and meetings with cherished colleagues – fills me with relief even as the aching for those for whom being present isn't possible. I hesitated over remote therapy, as my older clients prefer to use the phone. I shared my concerns with them: could they find a safe and private space at home? Would I be without my observing eye online? And how on earth do we get around joint mapping?
I am taken by surprise. They value telephone therapy contact and in turn are willing to ‘give things a go’. We are learning together anew from when you first bowled us over. CAT remote therapy work pushes forwards for my clients, and they are less alone: we feel less alone by trying therapy together with each other – above this chaos. I remain hopeful for these co-created therapy encounters still, blessed with my CAT supervision group who continue to be there for me, sailing towards a hopeful outcome.
Yours sincerely,
Katie Redman
kateredman@icloud.com